Closure

 My stomach is churning. I feel an uneasy warmth crawling out of my skin, painful, yet it gives me the chills. Tears well up in my eyes -- I can't breathe -- I'm choking on my thoughts - all the bad ones.  What am I feeling? What is my body dragging me like this for? What is all my energy draining into? Oh, there it is - the hand that you see, you desperately want to cling on to - hoping it will save you from the imminent death (of your feelings) - reach out before it's too late - grab the hand.. oh, but wait... it's only a mirage...from your undying hope in humanity... unrealistic expectations that someone gives a damn about saving you from damnation, the very damnation that they imposed upon you - or was that your own doing too? Unconditional love to narcissistic people tears your soul apart, burns every sliver of hope from your system and you condemn yourself to a life of eternal (80+?) misery. As if the mental agony weren't enough, our bodies receive these bad, nasty vibes as food and feed on them until every nerve, muscle, joint, blood cell are burnt black and charred to the point of no recovery. In the end, all we look for is not solace in one another, but an opportunity for closure, the one eluding hand that will never grab yours back.